The Unclaimed Gift: Because He Loves Me

"For he shall give his angels charge over thee, to keep thee in all thy ways." Psalm 91:11

When I was a little girl, my mother told me the story about pennies from Heaven. Even Dear Abby wrote about it frequently. The basis of it was that if someone needed to let you know that they were in Heaven watching over you, they would place a penny in a conspicuous place for you to find. There are many variations to the penny story but in the end, the pennies bring peace and comfort to the finder.

Through the years, whenever I would find a penny, I would be reminded of someone close to me who had just passed on. Just after my beloved grandmother passed away, I probably found a dozen pennies in the oddest places. Thus became a habit of picking up the penny and saying “love you too grandma”. It always brought a smile to my face.

One time, I sat with a family as we waited for God’s angels to free their father from the horrible pain of brain cancer. I related the story of the pennies to them just as a way to pass the time. They smiled at me and I could almost hear them saying in their minds “poor delusional woman”. Shortly after he passed away, I heard from both women. One had found a penny on top of the newly fallen snow as she went to get into her car. The other had found a penny in the sink of her bathroom. They thanked me for sharing the penny story.

Now I know that there are many who would disagree with the theory that angels can put pennies in your path. That’s ok. I am cool with that. We each have our own way of handling those unexplained events in our lives. Book stores are filled with stories of events or happenings that bring someone comfort and peace. Some call them God Winks, some call them coincidence, some call them little miracles. Whatever you call them, you can’t deny that they do happen.

A few years ago I started noticing that whenever I was completely at the bottom of my ability to handle things, when I was crying out to God to just let me know that things were going to be ok, He would answer me in the most profound way. With a feather.

Yep. A feather.

Now some would say it’s just coincidence and I probably would have agreed before I truly knew who God was. But the God I have come to know desires more than anything that I know He loves me and wants only the best for me. He has not promised that my life would be easy but He has promised that He would be with me every step of the way. He sent His Holy Spirit to guide me along life's rough and rocky paths. (Deut. 31:8, John 14:16, Isaiah 41:10)

The very first time I found a feather was so profound I could not ignore it. I was in Camp Lejeune, NC after sending my son off to war in Afghanistan. I could not let go of my grief. I was so distraught that I could not function. Because I suffer from depression anyway, there was so much darkness that I could not find my way out of it. I begged God to help me find peace, to give me comfort. I prayed Psalm 91 hourly for days. But I still could not get past the feelings of dread and fear.

As I sat outside one morning at a picnic table in the campground I was staying in (because somehow I felt that if I couldn't be with my son I could be closer to him by being where he left from) I knew that I had to move forward. I couldn’t live in this campground forever. I had a husband and a family waiting at home who needed me. I went into the trailer to get more coffee (of course) and when I returned, there was, on the Bible that was turned to the tear stained verses of Psalm 91, a perfect pink feather.

In that place of darkness and pain, I have no doubt that God heard my pleas. That simple event, especially in light of verse 4 of the Psalm, was the answer to a heartfelt prayer.

There have been a few more “feather” events, not the least of which was when a lady I was talking to felt impressed to give me a piece of her artwork that she said she had made on a whim without any clear idea of why she was making it. She said she didn’t like it but followed her promptings. I’m sure by now you know what it was. Yep. Made with a technique called Encaustic art, it was a wax rendition of a feather, complete with a real feather a man randomly given her that morning.

Now I never told her that I had a thing for feathers or that I had been suffering from another bought of depression that was threatening to overwhelm me once again, putting strain on my marriage and my job. But there, in the palm of my hand, was proof that God once more had heard my prayers.

Coincidence? Maybe. But I like to think of it as a simple “hug” from a God who has promised to keep me in His loving care.

Do you have pennies or feathers or winks from God in your life? I would love to hear about them.

Thanks for being along for the journey,